- Neck, jaw, shoulder, upper back or upper stomach pain.
- Shortness of breath.
- Pain in one or both arms.
- Nausea or vomiting.
- Sweating.
- Lightheadedness or dizziness.
- Unusual fatigue.
- Heartburn, also called indigestion.
Kat followed the sounds of muffled snickering to the overstuffed couch in the corner of the living room, where she found Anna ensconced within a mountainous pile of pillows.
“What’s so funny?” Kat inquired, as she lifted a small decorative cushion off the pile and gently tossed it on top of the book Anna was reading.
Anna grinned up from her paperback. “Nothin’,” she replied, before sliding the book in front of her face to avoid eye contact.
“Dude, we’re at a cabin on a summer book vacation, I know you’re not reading Tolstoy,” Kat teased, grabbing at the book.
Anna swatted her hand away good naturedly. “Whenever it says the protagonist said something in a ‘husky voice’, all I can picture is a literal husky screaming at me.”
“Oh my gosh, same!” Kat replied, her face lighting up in mutual amusement as she pushed Anna’s feet to the side and made herself comfortable on the squishy couch. “There are so many amazingly dumb romance tropes, but that’s one of my favorites for the same reason. It’s one of those things that works on the page but not in real life, because they’re creepy or super cringe. Like saying “you’re mine” or when someone licks their lips before a kiss. So gross.”
Anna shuttered. “Agreed. I do love the reenactment clips on Instagram where people try out different ‘book boyfriend’ tropes and are just goofing around. Two of my favorites are the wall lean and bottom lip brush. This one couple is hilarious, because the wife melts into a pile of giggles every time they try something.”
“I think I’ve seen them! I love how much they clearly like each other and are just having fun with it all,” Kat chuckled. “Another dumb one is ‘he growled’ a response. It does not translate well into real life. Exactly once has that made me giggle instead of laugh at it.”
“Oooh, pray tell when was that?”
“Did you see the watermelon crushing videos making the rounds on social media recently?”
“No, I don’t think so.”
Kat sat forward and pulled out of her phone. She opened Instagram as she began explaining about the Women’s Heart Health Awareness Campaign.
“I’m still not exactly sure how watermelons got involved, but content creators started making videos of themselves crushing watermelons - predominantly with their thighs - to grab people’s attention while they discussed women’s heart health and as a fundraiser for the American Heart Association. Have you ever run across Thor Bradley?”
“The sexy, wood splitting lumberjack? Why yes, I am aware of him.”
“He spearheaded this idea for a fundraiser and it took off, with other content creators committing to watermelon crushing if the fundraiser reached such and such a dollar amount. There were some pretty epic ones, including one fella choosing to emotionally devastate the melon. A fine gentleman named Andrew seemed to enjoy leaning into a romance novel vibe for his contribution, as well as in his commitment video, which also cracked me up. But yeah, I may or may not have giggled when a certain amount of growling took place.”
Kat blushed fleetingly as she handed over her phone so Anna could watch the aforementioned videos.
“There’s something about his patient exasperation that I really enjoy. And the way he says ‘Beloved’ and ‘My love’ when addressing the viewer? My dear sir!,” Kat laughed while making a fanning motion with her hand. “Until I saw that, I was unaware ‘Beloved’ worked for me.”
A brief giggle may have followed, but it may also have just been Kat clearing her throat in an odd manner.
“Personally, my takeaway is thick thighs really do save lives*,” Anna joked, slapping her own leg in appreciation. “Not going to lie, I kind of want to try it now myself. I’m curious about how badly I’d do, since even with all-the-muscles they clearly struggled.”
“Maybe we can grab some watermelons while we’re in town and give it a shot the next couple of days,” Kat said as she stood up. Removing a hair tie from around her wrist, she pulled her hair back into a high ponytail before reaching out her hand, offering to help Anna up. “Come on, let’s go touch some grass. I think I need a dose of reality after reliving my influencer fantasies.”
“Fiiiiine,” Anna pouted as she rose, handing the phone back to Kat. “I suppose my Scottish highlands can wait.”
A gentle breeze rustled the trees outside the cabin, just enough to make any fallen leaves scurry along the path. Their rental was nestled in a small glen halfway up Foliage Peak, offering a shaded oasis away from the crowds that tend to travel the first week of summer. The location was perfect for several reasons, including granting them access to multiple trails leading down into Maplewood Falls.
Since they weren’t in any hurry, Kat and Anna chose the scenic route, a wide path that meandered down the mountain at a leisurely slope. Their walk was used to discuss stereotypical romance plots that they liked, such as friends-to-lovers or the slow burn, and the ones they hated, like forced proximity or enemies-to-lovers (Pride and Prejudice and Anne of Green Gables being notable exceptions, of course). They had stopped at one of the many look-out points when Kat noticed someone walking up the trail toward them. It was a strapping fellow with wind-tousled brown hair, a beard and…was he wearing suspenders? She also noticed he was carrying a small backpack, which clearly wasn’t encumbering him in the least. As he approached where they were standing, Kat interrupted Anna’s TED Talk on the merits of opposites attract storylines, whispering “trust me” before fake stumbling into her, shoving Anna just hard enough to elicit a strangled sound as her weight shifted and she tumbled into the quickly outstretched arms of the handsome hiker. He caught her deftly, quickly helping her back to her feet amid a flurry of “oh my gosh,” “how embarrassing” and “I’m so sorry” from both women.
He laughed off their apologies with a hearty chuckle.
“No harm done,” he said with the slightest of accents. “Glad to be of service. Can’t have such a lovely lady falling down the mountain, now can we?” He introduced himself as Rory, a fellow visitor to the mountain.
Kat and Anna introduced themselves, and then Kat said, “Forgive the question, but what are you carrying in your backpack? It appears to be vaguely bowling ball-shaped, but I assume that’s not the case.”
Rory self-consciously ran his fingers through his hair as he grinned sheepishly. “Well, as a matter of fact, I was headed up the mountain to find a quiet place to film a video. Have you heard of the watermelon crushing challenge?”
Both women laughed heartily and explained how they’d just been talking about those videos. “And then what a coincidence, running into you like this?” Anna finished, smiling up at him.
“A friendly hip-check certainly didn’t hurt matters either,” Rory winked.
Now it was Anna’s turn to blush.
“Are you ladies headed into town?” he asked. When they replied in the affirmative, he suggested meeting up at the Autumn Nook, a cute coffee shop down in the town. “I shan't be long. How hard can it be to crush a watermelon?” His face grew mildly concerned at the snickers this comment caused.
“Need a videographer?” Anna asked coyly, twirling a strand of her hair in a playfully exaggerated manner.
Rory’s face took on a mock seriousness while contemplating the question, “Well, without a tripod it would be difficult to film it on my own. So I suppose if it’s not too much trouble…”
Anna half turned away from Rory and toward Kat. “You wouldn’t mind if we just met you at the Autumn Nook, would you?” she asked, mouthing ‘please, please, please,’ hoping Rory couldn’t see.
Kat’s amused smile would have been answer enough, but she also said, “I guess I can manage alone, as long as you promise to tell your grandkids this meet-cute was the result of my super accidental clumsiness.”
Dodging Anna play-punching her arm, Kat quickly started moving down the trail. “Just don’t switch genres on me, k?” she said, pointing back and forth between them. “I’m liking the romcom vibes over a horror movie for once! Byeeeeee!”
Kat could hear exasperation and then laughter as they moved in opposite directions. She continued along the trail toward town, occasionally passing other people heading toward the summit of the peak. The thought of some random hiker coming across Anna filming Rory attempting to crack open a watermelon in the middle of the forest was highly entertaining and kept her imagination occupied until she reached Maplewood Falls. The coffee shop was near the outskirts, so she didn’t have far to walk once she passed the “Welcome to Maplewood Falls” sign.
Reaching the front steps a few paces ahead of her, a man paused to hold the door so Kat could enter the warm glow of the cafe before him. She stepped inside with a smile and ‘thank you’, and her attention was immediately taken by a display of locally made hand-blown glass pumpkins. The man got in line behind three or four other customers while she inspected the various options. Deciding that clearly the one with cranberry flecks needed to come home with her, she got in line and took a moment to appreciate the perfectly cinnamon scented atmosphere.
The man turned around in line, and with a nod toward the display case asked, “I always get a scone when I come in, but I’m feeling adventurous. What are you getting?”
Briefly distracted by dimples and his pepper-with-a-little-salt curls, Kat double blinked at him and then looked toward the pastry options.
“Mmm, yesterday I got the Lunar Magic scone, but the day before I got the Pumpkin Patch Muffin. It’s, you guessed it, a pumpkin muffin with a brown sugar crumble and finished with a cinnamon drizzle. That would be my recommendation if you’re feeling a little daring. ”
“You had me at brown sugar crumble,” he said, placing his hand over his heart in warm appreciation, moving toward the counter as the line progressed forward.
“I’m Team Pumpkin, but it was the crumble that really sold it for me too,” she laughed.
“Nice to meet you, Team Pumpkin,” he said, the corner of his mouth quirking up as he vainly attempted to hide a smile. “I’m Dean.”
“You did not just…that’s the father of all dad jokes!” Kat said, surprised that she actually found it funny.
“Thank you, thank you, I’ll be here all week,” he bowed.
“He can call me pumpkin anytime,” she thought, thankfully just to herself. Out loud she asked, “Are you visiting Maplewood Falls or are you a local? I don’t know why, but the plaid-in-June is giving ‘I know it’s summer, but this is still a mountain’ tourist.” She gestured to his ensemble, which included a blue and cream plaid shirt, the sleeves rolled and pushed up to his elbow.
“Ah, yes…this is my ‘it is indeed a mountain and what else would I wear?’ look. What do you think, are the boots too much?”
“No. Suspenders would be too much, but that honor is already taken.” She started telling Dean about running into Rory on the trail as he reached the counter. She pauses to let him order.
“I’ll have an Americano, a Pumpkin Patch muffin and…,” he looked back at Kat, “for the lady?”
“Oh, that’s ok.”
“No, please. It’s my way of thanking you for the pastry recommendation.”
“In that case, what’s in the Canadian Insane Asylum scone?” she asked the gal behind the counter.
“That’s one of my favorites. It’s a pecan scone with a maple-infused glaze. Both the pecans and maple in it are locally sourced, so everything tastes really fresh.”
“Perfect,” Kat said. “And a coffee with cream, please.”
“And this glass pumpkin,” Dean said, pointing to the fragile squash Kat was holding. He raised his hand as she began to protest, saying “I’m just preventing the great pumpkin heist of 2026.”
“I forgot I have ‘master criminal’ written on my forehead. Thank you,” she said, gently squeezing his forearm with her free hand.
The gal behind the counter rang up everything, giving them a 3D printed black cat holding the number three and letting them know they could find a seat wherever and that she would bring everything out to them.
“Mind if I join you?” Dean asked, following Kat to a table for four.
“Please do. I’m waiting for my friend Anna and suspenders-Rory…oh, I didn’t finish telling you about him!” She shared about running into him on the path, her allegedly shoving Anna into his arms and how Anna offered to film his video. Somewhere in the middle of the story their order was delivered, the steam from their drinks adding to the ambiance of the cafe.
“Because that isn’t the plot of a stasher flick,” Dean commented, raising an eyebrow when Kat was finished.
“Right? I thought the same thing, but since the guy is willing to embarrass himself in order to raise money for women’s heart health awareness, I figured he was probably less murder-y than other people,” Kat replied, taking a sip of her coffee.
“Wait, was there a watermelon involved?” Dean asked.
“Did I forget to mention that part? Yes, he is doing that watermelon crushing challenge. That’s what he was going up there to film.”
Dean started chuckling as he pulled out his phone. “Great minds,” he said, his eyes twinkling as he pulled up a video in his photo gallery and pressed play. 🍉
In case you forgot what the Autumn Nook from "Pumpkin Spice and Autumn Delights" looked like in all its seasonal glory. 😊🍁🍂
That was so fun to read! Now I am looking forward to Fall! :)
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