Movie Review: I, Frankenstein

Yeeeeah...what can I say? I was in a weird mood Wednesday night and so rented it from Redbox. 

When I first saw the commercial for I, Frankenstein, my reaction was "whaaaaaaat?! Aaron Eckhart! Who talked you into doing this?!" The only reasonable explanations I came up with were A.) He reeeeally needed the money...or 2.) His now (hopefully) ex-agent signed him up to do this without his permission.

After watching it, my feelings have remained the same.  

Yeah...it was that bad. 

The movie starts out with a short version of the Frankenstein story...Doctor Victor Frankenstein (Aden Young) is horrified by his blasphemous creation and tries to kill it. The monster survives, kills Victor's bride in revenge and then buries Victor's body in the family cemetery when he dies of exposure in pursuit of his monster. Here's where the story begins to change a bit...and by a bit, I mean it runs completely off the rails. 

Demons approach Frankenstein's monster in the grave yard, note that the stories of his existence are true and are determined to bring the monster to their demon prince, Naberius (Bill Nighy). Two gargoyles (part of an order created by St. Michael the Archangel to protect humanity from demons) pop up and rescue the monster. They take him back their queen, Leonore (Miranda Otto), who spares his life and gives him the name "Adam." He then wanders the world alone for two hundred years, avoiding humans, demons and gargoyles alike. Somehow the demons track him down, at which point he decides he needs to destroy the source - Prince Naberius - if he wants the demons to stop pursuing him hither and yon. He makes his way back to civilization and into the modern world (it's amazing what a haircut can do!), figures out that Naberius is trying to build "an army of soulless corpses to be possessed by demons" with the help of research conducted by Dr. Terra Wade (Yvonne Strahovski), a scientist oblivious of Naberius' true schemes and who was trying to discover the secrets to creating life. 

Insert lots of fighting...lots of glaring...lots of scoffing and grunting...enough snappy one liners to make it feel like a Sylvester Stallone or Arnold Schwarzenegger movie...lots of broken glass...and that pretty much sums it up. 

Ooh. ooh...wanna know the last line of the movie?

"I, the descender of demons. I, my father's son. I, Frankenstein." 

(cringe) 

There you have it. I just saved you from wasting 92 minutes of your life. 

You're welcome and happy Friday. :) 


~ Katie